i slowly pushed myself upright with nothing else left and only a desperate desire to live again i made one last attempt a final attempt to either win or lose a victory would guarantee me life a loss would mean the end… its a pity it had to come to

as i lay in a heap of mess on the edge of life and death flashes of life that i once wanted and flashes of life that i once was played in front of me life that i once lived i cannot change life that i wanted to live now

some might call it stupidity some might call it arrogance while others might think i am being foolish society is like a chameleon they change colours as and when it suits them to me, it was the only thing left to do death was not an option to me running

i watched the shadow slowly engulfing my happiness part of me wanted to go away while the other part wanted to stay and put up a brave fight a fight that will either leave me dead or a fight that will allow me to live i cannot run forever i

this is a continuation of the previous poem – shadow ——————————————————- i stood there in total awe frozen by shock completely drenced in sweat i couldnt believe what i saw my inner self once completely pure in the few years i was on the sides i sold my soul to

i had plenty to sayi had to plenty to talkwords that once came gushing outwords that just wouldnt let this mouth closenow merely disappeared out of tracei tried searching it in the bankif i had mistakenly deposited it therei tried looking into my piggy bankif i playfully put it insidei

I’ve been down andI’m wondering whyThese little black cloudsKeep walking aroundWith mesometimes life is one big puzzleyou wonder why things are so jumbled upeven with all the pieces in handyou still struggle to put them all togetheri try to understand but wander around too muchto stay in one placei walked

i ran into this early morning sunshine like a kid completely unaware of the time the place i was in for a moment i was transported back to a time of unbound happiness hidden behind the dark clouds i was one with a purpose a purpose defined by time a

this is part 3 of the Fishing for a dream poem ———————————————————————————————————————— from the moment i saw you all the dreams i had in my heart suddenly disappeared instead of a million “materialistic” dreams my thoughts were filled with only one dream a dream that only had you a dream

note: this is the second of the two-part series that was started hereread below for more notes ————————————————————————————————————————–i sat downto fish for a dreama dream that i once hada dream that will complete it allmy life was on a fast changing laneturn left one minuteand i am pushed to turn

i searched everywherefrom the little shop in the corner of the streetto the big mall in the middle of the citysearching for what was in my mind a special thing that would be the best choicefor this occasiona little something that would say what i wanted to say countless hours

Sitting down in the middle of the bedi look upi look downi look to the rightto the left waking up in the middle of the nightsweating all overi tiptoe to the other roomtrying to make sense of this new “fear” fear that i once thoughthas been conqueredfear that i remembered

a gun shot, a child’s cry and a little laughtera small talk, a big argument and crazy fightstanding patientlyyou watch it with amazementsilently wishing for it to stopyet amazed how stupid everyone can be whenchaos, commotion, violencetake over their sanity words are violencethe more you talkthe more “insane” you becomethe

    i got lost in a worldthat was moving at bottleneck speeds(free) time is unheard oflove was measured in green (currencies)emotions were all just a scribble on the seashoreone after another – no reason, no rhyme staring out from my islandi feel helpless and so out of tuneno one

i dont know how i lost the gameit was secured in a safe placeaway from the prying eyesi thought i had mastered the art of keeping things safei thought i was safei thought i was secure when i still think about it now, a shiver runs through my spineand i

I lie there silently holding on to dear life right in the middle of the hustle and bustle i lie, unnoticed and uncared for aware of the trauma that is unfolding right before me unknown to the many souls outside i squirm and turn and twist aware that i am

This is a continuation of the previous poem – i am back ———————————————————————————————————————– moving away from the hustle and bustle i stepped inside letting my eyes adjust to this dim light i waited near the entrance with the music blaring on one corner a bunch of "drunken" idiots on other

stuck in the middle of nowhere i was this lost sailor attempting to repair my broken ship yet trying to sail away at the same time going nowhere spending far more(time) than i should be i was confused happiness was a thing of the past sadness written all over the